From the Founder, Brian Mazza 2/10
The Art Of Saying No starts with Yes
As we navigate the phases of discovering what we truly want and who we want to become, our lives often feel like a constant game of tug-of-war.
When I first started working in the Hamptons for Rachel Uchitel in 2007 at 22, I decided to become a "Yes man." I quickly realized that many of the wealthy people around me had endless demands—ice coffees, bagels, dry cleaning pickups, and someone to work out or hit tennis balls with. I also noticed their fancy cars and figured I could convince them to let me drive them while I ran these errands. That’s when my love for cars started to grow.
As a young guy, I never said no to anything. I drove around Southampton every weekend in 911s, Benz convertibles, and Range Rovers, becoming “the guy” for high-net-worth individuals who valued my reliability and relatability. I was in better shape than most, so the guys wanted to work out with me, and the women thought I was the cute little kid.
During those two years of saying yes to everything, I put in the miles and paid my dues. There was a time and place for being the guy who would take on any task—I was earning my stripes, and it paid off. Many years and countless unforgettable nights at Dune Southampton and Axe Lounge led to some of my biggest wins.
Now, as a 40-year-old entrepreneur, I rely much more on saying “no” than I do on saying “yes.” Here’s why:
1. Protects Your Time and Energy: Every time you say yes to something that doesn’t align with your goals, you’re spending time and energy on things that don’t move you forward. Saying no lets you conserve your resources for what truly matters.
2. Clarifies Priorities: Saying no is a powerful way to reinforce what’s important. It signals to yourself and others that you’re committed to staying focused on your big-picture goals, not getting distracted by everything that comes your way.
3. Prevents Overcommitment: Saying yes to everything can lead to burnout, stress, and reduced productivity. By saying no, you protect yourself from overcommitting and maintain a clear path forward.
4. Fosters Growth and Focus: Progress requires focus and intention. Saying no to distractions or less-important tasks frees up energy for what will truly help you grow.
5. Increases Self-Respect: Setting boundaries by saying no is a form of self-respect. It shows you value your time and energy, which boosts confidence in your decision-making.
Ultimately, saying no is about choosing where to invest your time and effort. It’s not about rejecting people or opportunities; it’s about saying yes to what brings you closer to your goals.
Timing is everything.
